Luck and Courage

I read both fiction and nonfiction. I love to escape into stories, made-up or real-life. I’m particularly a fan of the memoir (which really should come as no surprise given that a lot of these “musings” are intensely autobiographical in nature). So, here I am to report that I’ve just finished reading a particularly compelling one (memoir, that is).

I became acquainted with author Alice Sebold when I read her first novel The Lovely Bones. Although the book, a bestseller, was published in 2002, I probably picked it up around 2005 or so. Bones is the tale of a 14-year-old girl who has been raped and murdered – and who narrates the entire story from her vantage point beyond the grave: in heaven.

I remember thinking: this is an interesting approach.

For whatever reason, I found this novel to be totally intriguing: though certainly in a dark way. The book was anything but a “quick-read” for me.

On a trip to our local Borders store, just recently, I discovered that Sebold had written another book prior to Bones. In 1999, she published a memoir entitled Lucky (as in “lucky to be alive”). This work is a first-person account of her rape: a tragic event that happened on the last day of her freshman year at Syracuse University. The story includes a chronicle of her eventual identification (a few months later) of the rapist; the subsequent trial and conviction; and the progress of her life in the aftermath. The narrative also provides such details as: the status of her relationships with family and other men; her issues with heroin addiction; the gradual awakening to, and acceptance of, her post-traumatic stress syndrome; and the practically unbelievable development when one of her college roommates is raped, on Alice’s own bed, a couple of years later.

So, you’re probably asking: why is this is a story I’d be interested in? What could possibly make this book worth my time?

Good questions.

Just let me say that Sebold is an excellent story-teller. Although this is a very difficult topic to discuss, she pulls it off with incredible sensitivity and skill. And even though it’s autobiography, which goes into excruciatingly-gory detail, especially with the rape scene at the beginning of the book, it rather reads like a novel. I was completely drawn into her narrative. Wondering what will happen next…how will she find her way through this devastation…how can she put herself back together?

Naturally, Sebold’s life has had many twists and turns because of this crime. That she found the strength to look in the mirror, step back, and try to explain, to us, what she sees – well, this speaks to me of a person of incredible courage.

I am truly inspired by her ability to communicate through the written word, and her willingness to expose herself to the world in this way.

For me: as I write, I aspire to similar courageousness. I believe that it is through stories about the human condition that we learn more about ourselves. And that the lessons these stories offer, help us to live with our pain.

Keep Those Cards & Letters Coming!

Here is an excerpt from a short missive that came in by email from a reader in Oregon…

There is a lot of humor in your blog. I hope you can see it. Is it not supposed to be funny? …Thanks for sharing all of your hopes and fears with the entire world … You sir, are in a word, a handful . I mean that in the politest and most complimentary way. Your world view is so prickly (ala Mark Twain)…

Yes, yes, yes (!) dear reader…I hope you are able to share in the soap-opera humor that seems to be my life. I know I perhaps come across as deadly serious at times, but I suspect that those of you who know me best can “hear” my voice and know that there is mostly a lightness there…trying to take things as they come, turn them upside down, and then talk about them…in an embarrassingly public way.

Thanks for reading!

Free Speech Continued

I’m a big fan of the First Amendment. So finally, after a lifetime of thinking about it, last year I sent in my money to the ACLU and became a card-carrying member. Actually, it wasn’t long after I wrote a blog entry here entitled “Freedom of Speech” that I decided to sign up.

The reason I mention this now is that, quite recently, the topic of free speech entered my life as it pertains to this website. To wit, I have received the feedback that I might want to re-think my decision to discuss my job-search activities on these pages.

Upon hearing this person’s opinion, I admit to feeling mildly embarrassed…and well as somewhat stunned by the unexpected criticism. My initial reaction was to think “ohmygod, I must be f%*#ing up!” I also began wondering if I was, perhaps, unintentionally sabotaging my search for a new position. I immediately reacted to this individual’s viewpoint by un-publishing several recent posts that mentioned my job hunt and some experiences I had had during my travels.

However, in the past few days, I’ve been thinking a lot about my reactivity, and have re-read (several times) the posts I am now hiding from view. And, you know what? I actually think they’re pretty harmless. In these entries, I have talked mostly about myself (which is, after all, what I do here), about the exhausting nature and uncertainty of the job-search process (this is a secret?), and offered up some personal observations of events that have happened while I’ve been on the road.

IMHO, I’ve not harmed any person or organization. And, when I’ve tried to have a little fun by talking about the peculiarity of some things I’ve encountered along the way, I’ve taken care to leave unidentified the person(s) or group(s) involved.

It was quite some time ago now (in “First Do No Harm”) that I addressed the whole area of blogger ethics, examining my own behavior and motivations in publishing this work. At that time I specifically discussed my personal philosophy, including “ …[having] no outright intention of embarrassing, attacking, angering or hurting” anyone. And, really, let me reiterate: I certainly have no agenda to offend, attack or harm anybody here, including myself.

I hope that you, having found your way to this obscure little corner of virtual reality, will remain open-minded enough to allow me this minor self-indulgence (existing wholly apart from my professional existence) called TechnoMonk’s Musings.

Update on June 8, 2007:

After conscientiously re-examining this whole freedom-of-speech issue, I’ve decided to publish again the handful of posts I had hidden in reaction to a reader’s comment. So, if you browse this blog now, you’ll be able to read my rather benign writings on the topic of my job search.

Bush Surges

The cover story of the January 15 edition of Time Magazineexamines the question of “what a surge really means.” It now appears as if we’re headed for another boost of troop levels in Iraq, doesn’t it?

Despite the clear will of the American people expressed during last November’s elections, and contrary to the advice of practically everyone that matters (except, I guess, Senator John McCain), W is going his own merry way yet again: obviously living in a fantasy world that hardly anyone else inhabits.

MORE TROOPS IN IRAQ!?!?  HUH!?

Hey, George: you’re going the wrong way!

(I know, I know…there’s a punctuation error in the sign…it’s why I took the photo in the first place! See Eats, Shoots & Leaves for a thorough discussion of how we regularly – and publicly – botch punctuation.)

The Budding Novelist

Me? A “budding novelist?” That’s what one reader of this blog labeled me today after reading Teller’s Tale. My oh my, wouldn’t it be great if, one day, I penned (keyboarded?) a work of fiction that found its way to your nearest Borders?!

I must admit, writing that last entry was a lot of fun, and the words (on that topic, at least) seemed to flow quite a bit easier when using the third person. Curious, eh? I wouldn’t be surprised if ol’ Teller happened to make additional appearances on these pages now and then.

I was inspired to try the Teller experiment after going to see Stranger Than Fiction one more time on Saturday. While I’ve written lots and lots of narrative in the first person, including this blog and a significant portion of my dissertation, the thought occurred to me, while watching this movie, that a third-person narration just might be worth a try.